We go to church in Illinois (with a bonus seminary story!)

Geneseo Evangelical Free Church, Illinois

To indicate how close we’ve been to Pastor Steve Palm of Geneseo Evangelical Free Church, I’ll note that he came with us on our honeymoon.

Well, actually, it was  just the first couple of minutes of our honeymoon. Steve was one of my dorm mates in seminary and a groomsman in our wedding. My car (a Plymouth Duster) had been decorated (vandalized), and the back seat stuffed with crumpled newspaper and a hanging rack of clothes. As Mindy and I drove away after our wedding reception, we didn’t know that Steve had hidden beneath those crumpled newspapers. About half a block away from the church, I asked Mindy, “Where should we go first?”

Mindy asked, “Where do you want to go?”

And a voice from the back seat called out, “I don’t know, where do you want to go?” The car might have swerved a little.

So where we went was back to the church to throw Steve out. We all recovered and nobody was injured.

After seminary, Steve spent most of his years on the East Coast, and we were on the West Coast, and during the next thirty years we only got together one time. Through those years, Steve served churches in his native New York, in Florida, and now in Illinois. This visit was a happy reunion.

He’s been in Geneseo now for two years, and I spoke to a woman named Judy after a service and she said, “We love him! He’s such a wonderful fit here. I love him.”

Geneseo is a small farm town, hours from Chicago. Mindy overheard women discussing men who would miss worship that morning due to the local tractor show. (John Deere headquarters are not far away.) One would think a transition like this would be difficult for a native of Long Island who’s never shaken his Eastern accent, but Steve and the Ev Free Church of Geneseo have something much more important than geography in common; they share a love of God’s Word.

When I asked Steve about the church’s strengths, he immediately mentioned the wealth of good teachers in the church. Mindy and I (along with Steve’s wife, Cindy) attended an adult Sunday School class, and appreciated the lesson taught by Carl, one of several Adult Bible Fellowship (Sunday School) teachers whom Steve praised as quite able.

During snack time before Adult Bible Fellowship, we talked with Linda, Jeff, and Shelly. When I asked what they liked about the church, they all spoke of Steve’s preaching. Linda and Jeff talked about another church they’d attended, where the speaker might focus on a book he had just read or his own thoughts. They appreciated that Steve always spoke from the Scriptures. Linda mentioned that Steve always “threw in some Greek or Hebrew in a sermon.” Shelly said she also appreciated the fellowship found in the church, especially in the Sunday School classes and small groups.

We found the people in the church to be quite friendly, greeting us warmly even when they didn’t know we were friends of Steve and Cindy’s. (If they did know Steve, they wanted to know if the stories he told from seminary days were true. I’m not sure if it was a help or hinderance to Steve’s ministry to confirm the validity of his stories.)

We talked with Debby, the church’s Children’s Ministry Coordinator, who’s also part of the team working redesign the church interior. She was concerned that the room for fellowship and coffee was nearly invisible to people walking from the entrance to the sanctuary or children’s classrooms. She told us,  “People who attended the church for some time were unaware of the snacks available between services.” (And about those snacks. Way back in February in Kansas, we’d heard from a young man that we must try the breakfast pizza from the service station, Casey’s. Frankly, the very idea of service station pizza, let alone “breakfast pizza” frightened us. At GEFC, someone brought Casey’s breakfast pizza, with egg and bacon toppings, for snack time, and it was quite good.)

Debby said they want to tear down walls to reconfigure the lobby area of the church so people will feel more free to stay with their coffee and chat. (I’m not a coffee drinker -- Mindy is -- but this year I’ve come to see more and more the value of providing those opportunities for community before and after Sunday morning services.)

Geneseo has  “traditional” and “contemporary” worship services, but aside from a couple more hymns than choruses in one service than the other, the services were not very different. (There might usually be a greater difference, but Nate, the worship leader, was away on his honeymoon and the music was led by Nate’s father.)

We appreciated the time of open prayer in both services. Steve introduced the time by mentioning the previous day’s bombings in New York and mentioning the importance of the church being led by God’s Spirit rather than fear. A time was opened for congregational prayer. One woman prayed, “Father, help us to love our enemies, being as Jesus said, ‘wise as serpents and as harmless of doves.’”

The message , “Confronting Sin in Someone you Respect,” was the first in a series on “Hard Conversations.” As we’ve visited bars this year, a chief concern is that churches will be “judgmental.” This is a completely valid concern, and we know it was Jesus’ concern as well.

On the other hand, we’ve been to (for instance) an AA meeting where people have tell their story of being rescued when people “intervened” in their lives. I thought Steve addressed the tension well when he said, “There is a theological term for those who enjoy confronting people with their sin. That term is ‘jerk.’”

Steve used the story of 2 Samuel 12: 1 - 15, when the prophet Nathan confronted King David about the king’s sin in sleeping with a soldier’s wife and then orchestrating that soldier’s death in battle. In our culture, we might describe what Nathan did as “speaking truth to power,” but Steve pointed out that initially, Nathan tried a more gentle approach with David with the use of a parable. When that didn’t work, he pointed out David’s sin to him directly.

Steve referred to Proverbs 27:17, “As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend,” and mentioned that the church had conferences for both women and men coming that would focus on that theme. In the church, we do need each other’s help to deal with our failings, but Steve rightly pointed out the need to do so with love and grace. He mentioned a friend of his who was abusing alcohol and had a greatly strained marriage. Because Steve and others intervened, his friend is sober and his marriage is strong.

He ended the message with the “Paul Harvey, the rest of the story” version of the David/Nathan interaction. Steve pointed out that Nathan was able to go on as a friend and advisor to David. Tellingly, David would later name a son after Nathan.

Those friendships centered on truth and grace are important. I’m glad that we have such a friendship with Steve that continues.

Bonus seminary-related story!

While in Illinois, we were able to see another seminary friend, Brad Gundlach. I was able to participate in a quite different kind of church event. On Monday nights, Brad gets together with various folks from his church, St. Mark’s Lutheran in Lindenhurst, for ping pong. They’ve been playing for years, and on the night I visited, we played with David (the host), Peter, and Norb. Norb is in his early 90’s and can still beat most comers, able to return a volley to any corner of the table at will. Sometimes the pastor of the church shows up, and Brad’s son, Nathan, was a regular member of the Ping Pong Fraternity until he left for college recently.

Brad spoke of his appreciation for having his son being exposed to these good older men in the church, and he enjoyed the opportunities to play with and against his son, in such a safe and friendly atmosphere. (And just so you know, Norb had no problem whipping me in a game.)

Statistics (Traditional service/Contemporary service)

Service Length: 1 hour 1 minute/ 1 hour 8 minutes

Sermon Length: 34 minutes / 41 minutes

Visitor Treatment: Guests were welcomed at the beginning of the service and encouraged (as everyone at the worship service was) to fill out the Connection card in the bulletin. First time visitors were to drop their cards at the Welcome/Information desk (and be given a gift). We were greeted by several people at each service and during the fellowship time before and after the Sunday School hour.

Followup by Tuesday Morning: none (we were staying with the pastor and family, though, and they cared for us until we left on Monday)

Our Rough Count: 105 / 110

Probable Ushers' Count: 125 / 130

Snacks: coffee and decaf, hot water for tea or hot chocolate; breakfast casserole, fruit, yogurt, donuts, various other pastries, and Casey’s breakfast pizza

Musicians: violin (man), electric piano (man), vocal (3 women) / vocal (2 women), electric piano (man), acoustic guitar (woman), electric guitar (man)

Songs: Traditional Service

“Love Lifted Me”

“Praise to the Lord, the Almighty”

“10,000 Reasons (Bless the Lord)”

“How Great Thou Art/How Great is our God”

Contemporary Service

“Hosanna”

“Praise to the Lord, the Almighty”

“10,000 Reasons (Bless the Lord)”

“How Great Thou Art/How Great is our God”

Miles to church: 2

Miles from start: 37,347

Total 2016 Miles: 37,051

Church website: http://www.gefc.org/

Saint Matthew's Episcopal Church, Sterling, Virginia

Our timing was a bit off, so we're missing out on the fire.

In the announcements during the weekend services we attended at St. Matthew's, Trevor the youth pastor urged people to wear red the next weekend for Pentecost Sunday -- and perhaps bring a fire extinguisher, because he and Father Rob would be doing one of their favorite things: playing with fire in church.

For better or worse, Rob just used words and no Mr. Science for the weekend message while we visited. In the sanctuary ceiling, you can still see the hook used to swing a bowling bowl on a cable. There are no visible signs of the mousetrap gantlet that was set on another Sunday, but I hear rumors about the incident still circulate in Episcopal seminary halls ("What are they doing at St. Matthew's in Virginia?").

Mindy and I attended the Saturday night (contemporary) service and the 8:00 am liturgical service. She also attended the 9:30 contemporary service and the 11:00 am traditional worship, but I was more in and out since I attended a children's Sunday School class and helped with coffee and snack prep (women had the day off). The opening song for the Saturday night service was Cyndi Lauper's True Colors, and I greatly enjoyed singing along. Such songs are not new for this worship team; they've taken weekends to sing pop hits of the Beatles, the eighties, nineties, etc., and Rob tied the songs to his message and prayers. But the rest of the songs in this particular service are ones more typically heard on contemporary Christian radio.  

Rob did manage pretty well, though, with just words for this weekend's message. It was Mother's Day, which might go a long way toward explaining not blowing anything up. (Also, because it was Mother's Day, cards for mothers were available in the men's rest room -- just in case anyone forgot about the holiday.) The Gospel reading was from John 17 (the "High Priestly Prayer"), in which Jesus prays with such hope for his disciples who, from a human perspective, often seemed hopeless. Rob said that a mother's love and hope for a child often echoes God's love and hope for us. He told about his own struggles with athletics as a child, which brought him great discouragement. And yet his mother would tell him stories about a little boy named Ricky that, quite surprisingly, paralleled the life of young Robbie. Hope, in the "Little Ricky" stories, brought hope to young Rob. In the same way, God sees hope for us all.

We wanted to visit St. Matthew's because of Rob. Mindy and I knew Rob and his wife, Linda, back in our seminary days, and we've meaning to get together for a few years now (actually, frighteningly, for a few decades now.  One of the many things we love about this church and bar in every state tour is finally getting to see family and friends we've had good intentions of visiting for a long time.)

One advantage of staying at Rob and Linda's home was the opportunity to ask the questions we ask in a bar. Whenever we visit a bar we ask, "What makes for a good bar?" and "What makes for a good church?" Sometimes people ask us in bars, "Do you ask priests those questions?" Frankly, we usually don't. We certainly don't ask Baptist pastors we've just met those questions. But since I know drinking real wine (not Welch's grape juice) is part of Rob's job description, I asked him.

Sadly, Rob's attempt to answer my "What makes for a good bar" question was pretty much a fail. The problem is that Rob has never gone to bars, so he asked how others answered the question and echoed their answers.

To be fair, Virginia isn't much of a bar state. There aren't real bars here, just bars in restaurants. And Rob, though not a teetotaler, is pretty much a one drink and done guy. He hasn't given a lot of thought to the issue of what makes for a good bar.

On the other hand, he has given thought to what makes for a good church. Rob mentioned that this area, located so close to Washington D.C., was a difficult place to make friends. Many people leave for their jobs at 5:00 am and don't come home until after 8:00 pm, which leaves little time for socializing. But the church provides an opportunity for people to get to know each other.

I asked him what might be attractive to professionals in the life of the church. He said people see others who have the life they'd like; a life with healthy relationships and balance. He said church life offers mentors. He believes the Episcopal Church has an advantage over many Evangelical Churches because it doesn't promote a false sense of adequacy; the church takes Scripture seriously, but with an eye toward wholeness rather than as a rulebook for proper behavior.

Rob stressed that a good church should be welcoming, with an authentic spiritual life. Not everyone has to be on the same page, as long as they're moving in the same direction. People should be learning to live sacrificially, and the church should provide people with a sense of accountability. A good church should have a real impact on the community and the world (not just by writing checks, but through authentic relationships).

The final thing Rob mentioned was that a church should be fun, that people should be having fun together. This weekend, as he made announcements, Trevor told about learning to drive in a Honda Civic with manual transmission. He constantly stalled, making the car shake and rattle (but not roll). This led his father to earnest instruction. It led his mother to laugh uncontrollably. Later, Rob spoke with approval about this story and the importance of learning to laugh at ourselves as individuals and as a church.  

I spoke to a number of people during the weekend who affirmed that St. Matt's was living up to many of Rob's ideals for a good church. On Saturday morning I hung out with Trevor and youth group members outside a local Safeway as part of a food drive. Meredith, a high school freshman, said that over the last couple of years her family has gone through rough times, but there was always someone there for her at the church when she needed them. Another young woman, Hannah, said she came to the church with her family. Her folks had moved on to a Baptist Church because they felt more comfortable there, but Hannah loved St. Matt's, particularly the community focus, so she stayed.

When I talked with a man named Fred during the coffee hour, he affirmed Rob's hope for a place where people are kind even when they don't agree on everything. He said there are people at the church who view Scripture in a much more conservative fashion than he does, and there are even a couple of atheists in attendance, yet everyone treats each other with love and respect.

I talked with a group of ladies enjoying each other's company at a table in the fellowship hall. I asked what drew them to the church, and they said, "This." It was after noon, and several had been at church since the 8:00 am worship, but they were happy to be together.

We were quite happy, after years of anticipation, to join a weekend at St. Matt's. Even without the pyrotechnic teaching props.

Statistics

Saturday evening

5:00 pm (contemporary Eucharist)

Service Length: 59 minutes

Sermon Length: 16 minutes

Visitor Treatment: Rob introduced us at the end of the service and several people stopped to chat with us. The offering envelopes also have a place for visitor information (but we didn't turn one in until Sunday morning). During the "Peace" portion of each of the worship services, people seemed to try to greet people throughout the sanctuary, not just the one or two people around them.

Our Rough Count: 50

Probable Ushers' Count: 60

Snacks: none

Musicians: vocals (man, 2 women), electric guitar (man), electric bass (man), acoustic guitar (man), piano (woman) drums (man)

Songs: True Colors

The River

My Lighthouse
Holy

If I Stand

Impossible

Sunday morning

8:00 am (Rite I Eucharist)

Service Length: 55 minutes

Sermon Length: 15 minutes

Our Rough Count: 22

Probable Ushers' Count: 25

Snacks: donuts, muffins, cookies, fruit, lemonade, water, coffee, hot water for decaf or tea

Musicians: none

Songs: none

9:30 am (contemporary Eucharist)

Service Length: 1 hour 8 minutes

Sermon Length: 18 minutes

Our Rough Count: 135

Probable Ushers' Count: 150

Snacks: muffins, fruit, cookies, fruit hedgehogs and hummingbirds, chocolate dipped strawberries, coffee, hot water for decaf or tea, lemonade, water

Musicians: electric guitar (man), vocals (2 women, 1 man), piano (woman), acoustic guitar (man), electric bass (man), drums (man)

Songs: True Colors, The River, My Lighthouse, Holy, If I Stand, With Every Act of Love, Impossible

11:00 am (Rite II Eucharist)

Service Length: 1 hour 5 minutes

Sermon Length: 15 minutes

Followup by Tuesday Morning: none (unless you count constant loving care by Linda and Rob as we stayed at their house. We count that) We also got a personal email from the church's amazing office manager, Miriam, about a week later. 

Our Rough Count: 67

Probable Ushers' Count: 75

Snacks: same as above, with the addition of pita chips and hummus

Musicians: piano, choir (about 15 people)

Songs: Forever Praise (choir alone)

Thy Strong Word did Cleave the Darkness

Glory to God

Ticket to the Promised Land (choir alone)

Praise God from Whom all Blessings Flow

Sanctus

Open the Eyes of my Heart (choir alone)

Abide with me

Stand up, Stand up for Jesus

Miles to church: 4 miles

Miles from start: 13,338

Total 2016 Miles: 13,081

Church website: http://www.stmtts.org/

Bonus Kids Say the Darnedest  Things

I was glad to sit in on the 4th-5th grade Sunday School class, taught by a man named Pete who obviously cares for the baker's dozen of students that were in attendance. I noted some wonderful things the students said, comments on the story of Paul and Silas in jail from Acts 16. About the slave girl with a spirit of divination, a young girl said, "I like to think I have a super power." In answer to the question of what Paul and Silas might have done when they were freed from their chains at midnight, "Did they become nocturnal?" And another kid misread the jailer's plea, "How can I be saved?" as "How can I be a slave?"